I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
