Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
