She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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