I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
When did angry sex become our thing?
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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