im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
