I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
