that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
