didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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