Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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