Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
