I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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