sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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