If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
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