She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
