Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
