She just used a chaser for red wine.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize