I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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