He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
