Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
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