You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Randomize