covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
