I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Randomize
