I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Randomize
