Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
