Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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