I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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