no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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