That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
