It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
