yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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