i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize