You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I love you. Go after that dick
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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