PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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