Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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