No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Randomize
