this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
