plz talk dirty to me
I hate all girls vehemently.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
smell my finger.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Randomize
