i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize