just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
