what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
