Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
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