dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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