You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
