I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize