Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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