I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I lost the right to judge tonight
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
