Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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