singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
