On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
whose parrot is this?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
