3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Randomize
