I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
