Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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