Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
