does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
