? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
